I can remember so clearly when God started speaking to me. I was about 4.
At the time I chalked it up to my imagination.
My parents weren’t Christians so it wasn’t even something on my grid or in my understanding at all.
It wasn’t scary. Kind of sweet and reassuring for me really.
Little things would come to my mind that were not at all things I could conjure up or imagine.
At 12, about 6 months before my parents divorced, the Lord gave me a picture, a for-telling if you will, about the fact that my parents would no longer be married. I did think THAT very strange, but now I understand He was preparing me for a terribly difficult time in my life.
I can remember “knowing” that something was going to happen before it did.
A traffic jam, what someone was going to say, meeting someone on the street whom I already knew… Nothing to dramatic (except maybe the break up of my family ) but enough to have me wondering if I was a loon or had a heck of an imagination (I sure did have a flair for the dramatic!)… Do you know that I never bought into it though, I just felt a weird peace about it that I know now was the Lords .
The ironic thing about the way I was raised was that I attended a Baptist School Church because my mom wanted me to be exposed to the different religions, even if she didn’t believe, so I could choose some day.
I met the Lord at that school : ) See how God weaves things together?
Years later, I was in a workshop with one of my pastors in New York City called Clint Morgan (who now serves at the Morris Town Vineyard in New Jersey) He did a 2 day course on Words of Knowledge, Prophecy and Word of Wisdom. I was excited to learn as much about these things as I could, and Clint was an amazing teacher. He helped me to understand that all along what had been happening to me was preparation for gifts God wanted to deposit in me. A way to really discern the voice of God through simple images, thoughts and sometimes words. I felt like a light bulb went off in my head and felt all the pieces clicking into place of things that I hadn’t really understood about myself before.
The reason I am sharing about this today is to encourage you.
If I hadn’t come to the understanding that , even as a girl the Lord was trying to get me to understand and recognize His voice and that all those words and pictures were Him, my life would be very different today.
What an overwhelming confirmation for me that indeed God was my friend and protector.
That He wanted me to be in a relationship with Him. That He wanted me to access all that was available for me here and now.
There are gifts that you may have no real understanding about yet that have been working in your life recently or for a long time. One thing I know is that you have to be in charge of your own growth in your relationship with the Lord. It is US who need to feed ourselves.
Small Groups, Classes at Church, Sunday Service and Corporate Worship. I am starving for all those things, because ultimately they help me understand myself better and help this lump of clay become more and more the lovely vase or pot that I know I am meant to be.
We all “leek” and that is why we have got to refuel and fill our selves in these other ways.
That way everything we do is out of the abundance of the Holy Spirit and NOT out of our own strength!!
Living life with out these things is a sure formula for burn out and unhealthy beliefs and attitudes about how God sees us. Allowing God to be central is a sure formula for peace and wholeness. It allows you to move out of the way, say “Yes” to God and seeing unimaginably astounding things transpire in our life and the life of others.
Thank you for letting me share my heart!
Rebecca Turrigiano