The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. –Proverbs 12:18
I have been around people in many different environments: other countries, New York, watching people on the beach, visiting national attractions, schools, and restaurants. Sometimes I’m a bit of a people-watcher– waiting in lines, gathering in crowds, at school programs, etc. I have had lots of time to observe…people.
Boiling down my observations, here are two things I often see: 1) Spouses saying unkind things to one another, and 2) Parents verbally belittling their children.
I’m sure these observations don’t reveal anything new or surprising, but they occur so frequently that I cannot escape noticing them. People can be quite nasty to one another.
Since it doesn’t take intelligence to be critical, let me suggest one relational principle which I have found helpful. I realize that this is easier said than done, but it is as simple as this: don’t say everything you think!
Don’t say everything you think! I understand that holding your tongue takes self-control and a degree of humility, but the results can be amazing! When someone triggers an emotion in you, and you want to react with a verbal dagger…don’t. Don’t say everything you think. When someone injures your pride and you want to say something that will be a zinger comeback and put the other person in his or her place…don’t. Don’t say everything you think! When someone exhausts your patience and a strong reaction will make you feel better…don’t say everything you think.
I have a propensity for sarcasm, and in my mind, I can create some really strong statements…that no one hears but me. (Usually anyway. I do blow it from time to time.)
As a spouse and a parent, I’ve learned that I don’t need to say everything I think. When I slip up and allow the statements to escape my mouth, I end up wounding others, triggering more reactions, demeaning those I love, heightening tension levels, and creating negative memories. Words are powerful. Misguided words hurt and they can hurt deeply. As this Scripture points out, using reckless words is like stabbing another person with a sword. In almost every instance, it’s best to keep the sword in its scabbard.
Blessings,
Thora
Sometimes I think it must be easier for God to hold the whole world together and spinning in its orbit, than it is for people to hold their tongue! Great word, Thora!
Love your comment Kathy. This blog is so true. In high school we had to write about the tongue being mightier than the sword–first time I seriously thought about my sharp tongue (unsaved at the time)–still need the proverb. We really do want that healing part of the verse.
Yup. I totally concur. Sometimes I throw the daggers, sometimes I hear them. “The sword is better left in its scabbard”- so true!
What would Jesus say? If only we could ponder the answer to this question before opening our mouth.