Stay In The Present

I can’t tell you how often I have heard people say “this happened for a reason” or “it’s all part of God’s plan”.

I’ve said it too and I remember why- what I was hearing was so hard to listen to. I wanted the person I was speaking to to know that in the end they would learn something from their experience; that in the end God would redeem their loss. But my comment was looking past the present moment to the future.

My comment was not allowing the present moment to be fully recognized. I didn’t want to feel their pain.
It’s hard to be in the moment when the moment you are in is painful, especially if you stay in the moment and realize- you might cry.

It’s better for us to be in the moment with those grieving then to point them away from what they so desperately need to feel and process.

I’m not talking about depression. I’m talking about loss and grief. Let’s allow ourselves to be vulnerable with our friends and family.

Entering into someone’s pain to come alongside them requires putting aside one’s self. It is often uncomfortable to watch a person suffer, pointing them away from their pain to the future hope that Jesus has in redeeming their suffering has its place in the healing process- but so does grieving.

I struggle at times to deal with my own pain and grief. Seeing how I respond to those I love when they’re in pain can signal to me how I cope with myself as well.

Pain and suffering are a part of our life meant to be respected- and I believe shared as well. I want to be open enough and brave enough to come alongside my friends and family while they’re suffering and sit with them so they’re not alone.

Sometimes we have to feel the pain first in order to move on to the freedom.

David was really good at being in the moment:

Psalm 143:3-10
The enemy pursues me,
he crushes me to the ground;
he makes me dwell in the darkness
like those long dead.

So my spirit grows faint within me;
my heart within me is dismayed.

I remember the days of long ago;
I meditate on all your works
and consider what your hands have done.

I spread out my hands to you;
I thirst for you like a parched land.

Answer me quickly, Lord;
my spirit fails.
Do not hide your face from me
or I will be like those who go down to the pit.

Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love,
for I have put my trust in you.
Show me the way I should go,
for to you I entrust my life.

Rescue me from my enemies, Lord,
for I hide myself in you.

Teach me to do your will,
for you are my God;
may your good Spirit
lead me on level ground.