Connecting
John Ortberg, author, said, “The yearning to connect, to love and be loved, is the fiercest longing of the soul.”
Deep down, we all crave that place where we “know and are known” by others—a place of community. Although it may be scary at first, getting to know other women or going to a Care Group or Bible study, can have a multitude of benefits for those who persevere past the initial uneasiness.
We all have a need for community and other people. Some of us have been negatively affected in our youth by the antics of other adolescent girls. However, women have unique qualities they can share with other women. We must be willing to see the positives and push through the negatives of the past in order to see the benefits today.
Some of the benefits of the friendships of women:
- A gift of intimacy rarely seen in men
- satisfying a need for connection
- Keeps loneliness at bay
- Friends can be buffers against stress
- Healthy friendships can improve marriages (meeting some relational needs and diffusing anger)
- Good friendships provide modeling for daughters or other young women
- Takes some pressure off of husbands to meet all of a woman’s relational needs.
- Breast cancer patients in support groups live longer than those not in groups.
It is also interesting to note that the majority of those seeking psychiatric help do not have a close friend.
Ok then, how do we get some close friends? It doesn’t happen overnight, but we need to start somewhere. Right now is a good time to begin showing ourselves to be friendly. It will take time and effort to build friendships. Since we become like those with whom we spend time, it is wise to choose friends carefully. Being around other people can help us to practice things like forgiveness, keeping commitments, kindness and communication skills. These are great character traits to rub off on one another.
Make the effort to begin establishing some healthy connections in your life. It will be worth the effort!
Blessings,
Thora
