“How do I love thee?  Let me count the ways”.  These are beautiful and oft repeated words from Elizabeth Barrett Browning’s lovely poem.  With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, I have actually been giving some thought to “the ways,” and how often we overwork or undervalue the word “love.” 

My husband, David, and I have what I think of as mature love.  We’ve been married 32 years, and have been on the mountaintops as well as deep in the valleys as child-rearing, in-laws, finances and careers have affected us. 

I enjoyed watching our two daughters, Christa and Amy, go through puppy love several times as they flitted their way from toddlerhood to adolescence.  Then there was young love as they became interested in some nice young men who were around the landscape for weeks or even months.

Unrequited love is something we’d probably all like to live without.  Both girls had crushes on guys who didn’t notice them.  (As a doting & proud mother, I think those guys must have had rocks in their heads, or been blind.)  Fortunately, we all lived through those phases, but not without tears and disappointment.  Pouring salt on the wounds were the occasions when one daughter liked a guy, but he liked the other sister.  What a mess!

Another challenge is tough love.  When our girls failed to stay within boundaries we had set, consequences followed that no one enjoyed.  It really is true that this hurts parents more than it hurts the kids.  As they grew older and failed to set their own appropriate boundaries, they got hurt, taken advantage of or were disappointed.  Then they had a better understanding of what we went through.

 Just for fun, I love going to Mimi’s with David.  (I tell him I like it when he speaks French to me.)  I love watching ASU or Cardinal’s games and yelling my head off in the living room, even though David keeps telling me they can’t hear me.  I also (mostly) love HGTV, and I definitely love the British versions of the Jane Austin classics.  I love my family; it’s a great one!  And of course, I love my husband, who tells me and others that it’s his job to be an Ephesians 5:25 husband; and to make sure there’s always money in my checking account.

 I love my Mother who is generosity personified.  I love my 3 beautiful and intelligent sisters.  I love my one living daughter, Amy, who makes my life more worthwhile, and I positively love & adore my twin grandsons who are cuter and more fun than a barrel of monkeys.  I cherish the love and memories of my first daughter Christa, who lives with and enjoys the love of the Father in heaven.  And I can’t leave out how much I love my numerous aunts, uncles and cousins, who are too numerous to count.

 I proudly love my country, many of my co-workers, and some good books I’ve read more than once.  I love a relaxing vacation as much as I love a rousing debate on one of the educational channels.  I love my church and the friends we’ve made there.  I love serving meals to our small group, and I love to worship.

 And speaking of worship, that really brings me to the most important and profound love of all, the love of the Father.  The love poems that lighten our days, our nights, our burdens and grief; the prophesies that give us a future and a hope; the instructions on living fruitful and righteous lives are all delivered in a love letter from God: the Bible.  

 Just think of the love He rains down on us:  For God so loved the world … How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God … Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God … It is not good that man should be alone, I will make a helper … Come to me, all you who are weary … and I will give you rest … Your sins are forgiven … And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Counselor to be with you forever.  Amen and amen.  That is the love that we all can earnestly and fervently desire and pursue.

Paula Gray

We hope you enjoyed the guest post today from Paula Gray.  She and her husband David have been active members of the Vineyard Norh Phoenix for many years, and served in a variety of different ways.  Currently Paula is a Women’s Ministry Care Group Leader, and she and David serve together as Marriage Ministry Coordinators and lead a marriage small group.

Categories: Women's Ministry

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